Feelings of inferiority affect your body image, goals, and achievements -- and not in a good way! And, low self-esteem affects more than just you: in fact, the effects can spill over into your family, workplace, or even a community – like ripples in a pond. In fact, whole countries can experience the consequences of low self-esteem!
Psychology Today’s report on plastic surgery in Argentina (Nov/Dec 2006) suggested that whole countries can feel inferior to more established, wealthy countries – similar to how individuals can feel when they compare themselves to other people. In Argentina, “There’s a strong pressure for women to adhere to a European look, and if they don’t fit the mold, they suffer harsher judgment, personally and professionally, than in many other countries.”
Plastic surgery is seen as a bridge to a “better” world: a world of modern fashion appearances, wealth, and images of perfection. Argentina is “among the top-ranked countries in per capita rates of cosmetic surgery” states the president of the Argentine plastic surgeons’ association. “Almost every girl I know wants to have something done,” says a 23 year old Argentinian secretary. She wanted a breast enhancement at age 12 or 13, and had her nose straightened when she was 16 years old.
Nurturing a healthy self-esteem is about more than breast enhancements and rhinoplasties. It's about facing your fears and treating yourself – and others – with respect and compassion.
Myths about self-esteem
Myth: People with high self-esteem have big egos. They're vain, selfish, and opinionated.
Fact: Loud, opinionated people who hog the spotlight actually have very low self-esteem. They look extroverted and happy and in control – but often it's the shy, quiet introvert who has healthy self-esteem. They have nothing to prove, and they accept themselves for who they are (not always, but often).
Myth: It's possible to have too much self-esteem.
Fact: If we define self-esteem as feeling capable of coping with the problems life brings and being worthy of respect of love, then you can never have too much! Bragging and excessive self-absorption are indicators of low self-esteem.
Myth: Nothing bothers you if you have healthy self-esteem.
Fact: No matter how mentally healthy and strong you are, you will feel anxiety, sadness, insecurity, self-doubt, fear, and even depression. Life is hard. People with healthy self-esteem generally bounce back faster than those with low esteem.
Myth: You develop your self-esteem in childhood, and it stays the same throughout adulthood.
Fact: Your esteem may rise and plummet throughout your life, depending on your circumstances and experiences. Various people can boost you up or drag you down, but your self-esteem isn't determined by your childhood.
Feeling capable and worthy is the foundation of a healthy self-esteem. If you feel like you can handle most of life's surprises with confidence, if you treat yourself with respect and expect others to do the same, then you probably have a healthy self-perspective. If not, you may want to figure out who you are in this world.
Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen - Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen is a full-time writer and blogger in Vancouver, BC, and the creator of the Quips and Tips blog series.
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